How to spot and stop bullying, what to do if your child is a bully or bullied in school.
If your child is experiencing bullying or berating like a bully at school,these behaviors can impact at their self-esteem, relationships, and mental health. As a parent, you can also help to protect your child’s emotional health by recognizing the signs of bullying and ensuring that your child gets the help he or she needs.
Signs of bullying
Though these symptoms could stem from other causes, a child who is being bullied may show one or more of the following:
- Not wanting to go to school
- Loss of personal possessions such as clothes, toys or books
- Frequent headaches
- Trouble sleeping
- Unexplained injuries
- Having issues at school, in relation to grades or behavior
- Avoiding social situations
- Poor self-esteem
Conversely, signs that your child is being a bully may include:
- Knowing new friends are experienced bullies
- Engaging in fighting physically or verbally
- Suddently you have new ownerships
- Overly aggressive or competitive
- Discipline problems at school
- Passing the buck for their foibles
- Worry about social status or popularity
Whether verbally or physically, both have a negative impact on your child’s mental health, resulting in dangerous or self-destructive behaviors. If you note these signs in your child and identify bullying issues, it is important that you work with your child to encourage positive behaviors and adaptive coping skills.
What to do if your child is being bullied
If you suspect your child is being bullied, you should talk first to your child’s teachers and administrators. They may or may not realize it’s a problem, but schools are increasingly taking steps to curb and prevent bullying.
Besides speaking with the school, it’s also important to speak with your child about the bullying and how to deal with it.
Teach your kid strategies for walking away and for not engaging with a bully. A lot of bullies are doing it just to get some amount of attention or a response. On the other hand, if the targeted child removes that satisfaction, it can halt those behaviors.
Give your child your love and support And, while bullying behaviors are never justified, you might also want to talk with your child’s teachers to find out whether your child is doing anything that may be making them a target. For instance, children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) may experience bullying in some cases due to the impulsive behaviors associated with their ADHD diagnosis (e.g., talking during class, invading others’ personal space).
How to end your parenting child bully
If you suspect your child is a bully, it’s time to call in backup, says Dr. Holland. Collaborate with your child’s teachers to come up with a plan for what your child will face for bullying, both at home and at school. Regular communication with your child’s teachers is key to ensuring consistent enforcement of the behavioral plan — the most effective route to stopping bullying.
Discussing empathy and feelings with your child is good, too.
Ask your child how they would feel if somebody did that to them so you can teach empathy and perspective taking. How did the other kid respond and how did that make them feel? Encourage them to see things from others’ perspectives to know what it feels like to be bullied.
Individual and group counseling, therapy, and therapy are also available, which help both bullies as well as their victims improve behavior and achieve better mental health.
