In the context of children’s friendships, parents often overlook what their child does while spending time with friends. Currently, there are many cases of bullying where one child harms another. Therefore, as a parent, it’s important to teach your child to defend themselves.
Each child will have a different way of defending themselves, but you should teach them how to respond appropriately when they hear hurtful words in their social circles.
1. Encourage your child to stand up for themselves and recognize their self-worth
Teach your child how to defend themselves in a positive and non-aggressive way. They need to understand that others’ judgments don’t always reflect their true worth.
Help your child recognize their strengths and positive attributes. For example, if they feel sad or anxious after being called ugly, guide them to think about their positive traits, such as their talents, good character, or unique abilities. By understanding their self-worth, they will be better equipped to face negative comments and respond with confidence and kindness.
2. Teach them that differing opinions are not bad
When a child is called ugly by someone else, their emotions may be shaken, especially if they haven’t learned how to handle criticism or negative opinions. As a parent, help your child understand how to respond positively in such situations.
Start by introducing the idea that differing opinions are natural in social interactions. Explain that everyone has different perspectives, including about physical appearance. For instance, you can say, “Everyone has different opinions about beauty. Some like long hair, while others prefer short hair. The most important thing is that we feel comfortable and proud of ourselves.” This way, your child will learn not to be overly affected by subjective judgments from others.
3. Teach them not to take negative comments to heart
Another valuable lesson is helping your child to stay wise and not be overly influenced by negative words. Teach them they can choose how to react to negative comments.
For example, you can say, “If someone says something unkind, you can decide not to take it too seriously and continue your day happily.” This approach will help your child manage their emotions and remain resilient, even when faced with unfavorable opinions.
4. Train them to handle criticism calmly
Negative comments or criticism can often trigger emotional reactions like anger or sadness. Teach your child to manage their reactions calmly. Encourage them to take a deep breath and pause before responding, so they can reply thoughtfully.
For example, say, “When someone criticizes you, try taking a deep breath and waiting a moment before speaking, so you can think more clearly.” This will help them respond positively and develop emotional resilience, boosting their self-confidence.
5. Provide emotional support
As a parent, offering strong emotional support is crucial to help your child navigate these situations. Start by listening to their feelings without judgment or interruption. Give them the space to express how they feel about the comments they received.
You might say, “I hear that you’re feeling sad because of what was said. Can you tell me more about how you feel?” This shows them they are valued and heard.
Sometimes, emotional support can be as simple as a hug or a loving touch. A hug can provide comfort and remind them they are unconditionally loved. If they feel sad, give them a hug and say, “I’m always here for you, and you don’t have to face these feelings alone.”
These are ways you can guide your child when they face negative comments about their appearance. Remember, physical appearance isn’t the only measure of worth. What matters most is how they feel about themselves, how they treat others, and how they develop positive skills and character. With the right support, your child will learn to stay confident, resist negative comments, and grow into a strong and valuable individual.
